MY CANDID CONFESSIONS--CONTINUES

Once, one of my arshian dost shared her experiences of a  psychiatry lecture with me where lecturer pointed out features of Alcohol Dependence..

1) Strong desire or compulsion to drinking

2) Difficulty in controlling drinking behaviour

3) Develop withdrawal symptoms when stop drinking

4) Tolerance (need more and more by the day)

5) Neglect of alternative pleasures

6) Keep drinking despite evidence of harm

Hehehe.., my friend suggested that lets erase "alcohol" and "drinking" and put on "Arshi fever" and "Watching"...... Don't we have Arshi Dependence too???

OF COURSE  I AGREED  ,WE SUFFER FROM ARSHI DEPENDENCE....

In my opinion, the lecture was not about Alcohol ....It was about US..*looking suspiciously at the lecturer*...has he read our comments???

*behaving detectively like arshi* Lets check out about this lecturer , either he is an arshian  and experiences these symptoms himself or he is that compulsive representative of real world ,who is futilely  trying to teach us a lesson about dependencies......LOL...

A BIG HEARTY WELCOME TO ALL LOVELY ARSHIANS....

*big hug gesture*

BAHOON MAIN CHALE AAO..OOOO ARSHIANS

ARSHI-ISM SE BHALA KYA PARDA

YEH ARSHI-JOURNEY NAHIN KUCH DIN KI

YEH SAFAR HAI UMAR BHAR KA

With these noble thoughts in our heart..lets continue our arshi journey through the medium of

MY CANDID CONFESSIONS

Now this post mostly contains my sanak-bhare comments in the post-marriage era..I know some of the readers must be thinking that whether some kind of pun was intended in the last line bcoz post marriage era did turned out to be quite a crazy experience for all arshians but nahin re *rajesh khanna mode*

HUM ARSHIANS KO YEH BIGADE HUE HALAT

KYA  ROK PAYENGE....

HUM MAIN WOH ADA HAI KI,

SHEETAL AAYE YAA SHYAM....

HUM THO TAKLEEFON MAIN BHI MUSUKARANE KE

BAHANE DHOOND LAYENGE..

*well all regulars have accepted the fact that I am a big dramebaaz*

The day GFP *girl from the past*entered the scene....arey wahi another ‘S’ of raizada house... , I started making ‘GOLGAPPA TALKS’..well if u wanna know more about these talks then read on..

WE r so much in love with arshi that evil-est nicknames & abuses for anyone disturbing their lives flow out of our mouth like everyday words, here r the few which me n my arshi family created for Ms  "S" during the ‘SNAKE N BABY’ drama that happened at RM:

·        -GFP: GIRL FROM THE PAST

·        -SG-SNAKE GODDESS

·        -ND-NAAGIN DAAYAN

·        -SB-STALKER BITCH

·       -FV-FAKEST VAMP(THIS ONE IS A FLEXIBLE ABUSE...which can be converted to FDV,FCV or FNV..D-DAAYAN,C-CHUDAIL,N-NAGI­N)

And of course everyone was free to choose theirs, depending on the levels of their hate for her. Then my sweet friend memy in her highly hate-filled CHINTAMANI modes tried to combine them all and gave her a name "NDSCG-GFP"  hahaha doesn’t  that abby sounds like name of a rocket missile...PSLV-I/II/IV etc.

But don’t u all agree that her hatred was quite justified at that time. The various ‘S’ keep on entering RM with an aim to convert it into their personalized SNAKE HOUSE....

*Welcome to my Snake Mode—hehehe—this one is my most bizarre comment*

“Everything is possible in the "WORLD OF SNAKES"..if shyamu baby can kill his own baby then snake goddess(SG) is only using hers'. NOT A BIG DEAL IN SNAKE WORLD..i guess,,,I think RM has been built over some old tantrik's adda..some amrish puri types place from that sridevi's movie about snakes...thats why all types of snakes become attracted to the building and want to build their adobe here. .with either of the two most gud looking ‘NAAGMANIS'....”

And if that one is not enough to put a light on the emotions I was going through in those ‘S’ times..maybe the next one will do...

A question difficult than 5-crore question on KBC: WHAT WILL HAPPEN ON MONDAY?? *day of DNA test result*

a)Positive result

b)Negative result

c)Khushi will tear it up

d)Peeking SG will interrupt

WELCOME EVERYONE TO THE MOST HAPPENING GAME IN ARSHILAND RIGHT NOW 

*sarcastic tone*

KAUN BANEGA ARSHIPATI?

OR MORE APPROPRIATELY....

"KAUN BANEGA AARAV-PITAH?"

And if all these OTT comments were not enough, I entered the mode which I myself discovered during ‘S ‘ times---MY JALEBI MODE..to get a clear picture of this mode just read my speculative analysis n discussion with one fellow arshian..

ME: All this MATERNAL AUNT ANGLE is appearing correct to my over-analytical mind. She is the kid's maasi..that dhruv bastard ditched her sister and she came to RM to fit NCA *aarav*in this wealthy and reputed house as arnav's son so that not only kid gets his right to be part of the family but she also gets arnav..HER ONLY LOVE WHOM SHE CRAVES FOR EVEN NOW"..THATS WHY ALL KC-SHIT DONE BY HER...bcoz she still feels for him definitely...

HER: but why the karwa chauth fast???? i don't buy this maasi crap, she is his mother and keeping a fast for someone else's hubby is a WRONG...on many levels! *furious and hyperventilating in anger*

ME: infact her keeping the fast led me to believe in this 'maasi' angle, thats the first actual -ve shade of hers we witnessed today but she did tried to hide it all. If she was kid's mother and arnav is not his dad(WHICH I FIRMLY BELIEVE-SIGN KARA LO STAMP PAPER PAR) then she would have kept fast for his actual dad na..but she kept it for him indicating that she is not directly involved in child's parentage and still holds a torch for arnav

HER: I don't get what u just said.... samjhao mujhe!

ME: if she is the actual mother then she will keep fast for arnav only if he is the dad of the kid.. and as i firmly believe he is not the dad so she is also not the real mother..*mujhe chakkar aa raha hai apni gol-gol baaton par*BACHAO...I WILL DIE BCOZ OF MY OWN OVER-SPECULATIVE MIND AND ITS BIZARRE REASONINGS..

KUCH SAMJH AAYA????....Well this is called the

‘JALEBI MODE’ OR THE GOLGAPPA TALKS..

 And hey I have got one more mode 

MY LAPTOP MODE

When I am all into serious commenting and practical approaches *RARE HAI WAISE*..I call it "MY LAPTOP MODE*..based on ASR's sincere serious waala obsession with his laptop...

But, u know what biggest tragedy happened to me during THE GFP ERA..my comments started getting spammed ,but YT can never win against MY ARSHI PERSISTENCE..so I won and wrote this....

”THANK U YT DEVTAJI..*ok getting a grip of myself* YES...YES..YESS..I AM NOT NCA..I AM THE LEGIT DAUGHTER OF YT...DNA match hogaya or should I say YT just teared the report & believed me bcoz YT KA TRP THO HAI HI HUMSE *IMMODEST WINK*

If thats not enough ,here’s my  most exasperated comment after watching khushi’s sad face at the basketball court...

Arnav khelte khelte thak gaya hai

Khushi sochte sochte thak gayi hai

Arey koi hamare bare main bhi socho,

HUM DEKHTE DEKHTE 

THAK GAYE HAIN

I suppose GFP episode did bring out my sarcastic best..here’s a comment to prove that..

“Those 2 ANGEL-SELVES sitting on khushi's shoulders....I AM GOING TO SHOOT THAT ANGELIC WHITE ONE WITH MY BANDOOK..........WHY SHE HAS TO ACT ALL SO BHARTIYA NARI????????thats not khushi..if they r going to show her go all sacrificey than they r soo damn big GADHAS'..khushi is of that type who will scratch out the eyes and pull out the hair of anyone who comes b/w her and him, and definitely not the one to say...."GO AWESOME THREESOME MY WISHES R WITH U"......

And then the concept reached heights of ill-logic leaving me  burning with fury when arnav too chosed to ignore her ...and I wrote this..

“AWESOME TWOSUM..really...really...real­ly arnav  *looking at arnav shockingly hurt* STOP CHECKING MY PATIENCE MR. ARNAV SINGH RAIZADA....thank ur god that u realized ur mistake the very next moment and asked for ur wife otherwise I had planned to GHUSO into the tv and turn u around to look at the person standing behind u who was deeply stabbed with ur words...JUST KEEP THAT IN MIND THE NEXT TIME..TUM ASR HO THO MAIN BHI ARSHI FANDOM KI ASR HOON GRRRRRRRRR “

And this:---

URGGGGHHHHHHHHHH the holy CVS of the beginning have gone on holy trip and we have to get along with these NAKLI SADHUS' who don't know a bit about ASR..AREY NIKAMMON..TUMSE RESERCH NAHIN HOTA THO HUMSE POOCH LETE..HUMNE PHD KIYA HAI ARSHISIM MAIN..

And wrote one in “MY GUJARATI MODE” too when it was being rumoured that arnav will break GFP’S karvachauth ...grrrrrrrr..

“Arnav trying to give water to SG on KC can be sumhow tolerated *urghhhhhh stress on ‘sumhow’ here* but if that damn water actually reaches SG's DANK BHARE lips than *IN GUJARATI* ARNAV CHOKKRA..TUMI THO GAYO"..I AM GOING TO KICK UR ASS REALLY HARD..

Hey ,,I guess I got carried away with my own emotions..returning back to candid mode...dont u all agree that show could also have been named “INN CHASES KO KYA NAAM DOON?”..nahin samjhe..read the next one:--

“There is no physical chasing involved in this show, just the mental one with all the creepy ideas:

1)LA chased arnav..but quitted midway & became a nice girl

2)NK tried to chase khushi as he does with any girl but learnt his lesson all too quickly

3)THE SUPREME CHASE..chase of lust by creepwa for khushi..but the damn baby killerwa himself cried like a baby in the end

4)THE FAKE-O CHASE BY GFP...hahahaHa*evil sarcastic laugh*...after reading the above DO I NEED TO EXPLAIN MORE????

Inn chases ko kya naam de?..lol...

simple answer “FAILED CHASES”     *happy wink*

And in all this GFP mess..we were starved for RVs to happen so much that I returned back to my ORIGINAL punching bags....

“Our CV gods..their stale minds r active only on Fridays...Jumme raat par hi inki ghanti bajti hai..rest of the days they act like true Hanuman Bhakts..showing no RVs at all..but at the end of all this mythological hip hop..they always provide MOKSH to us..

p.s. if u dont understand hindi so well..then you can NOT ask me meanings of all these words bcoz I am not khushi..& my 'Ekagratha' needs 'EEkant' as I will feel 'AAtankit' by u...*LOL*..”

Dont u agree that we all..and I SERIOUSLY MEAN ‘ALL’ should take hindi tutitions from Mrs. KKGSR..she in her utter hindi mode can make even hindi laureates scratch their heads and pop their eyes..LOL..here are my special comments on her linguistic skills...

“Khushi may or may not succeed in her “WHOSE BABY R U” plans but she will definitely succeed in one thing, teaching hindi to all non-hindi speaking audiences..OMG, the difficult words she uses “AAtankit”,”EKAANT”,”Aikagrath­a”,”khansama”..phew..I thought I knew my hindi but she really makes me feel like having classes again*fingers b/w my teeth*

All of you will agree with me that there are two most worthy attributes of life which IPKKND has taught us..one is ‘PATIENCE’ and other is to ‘STAY HAPPY ALWAYS’  ...unaffected by any fuckery life may throw our way, in general and CVs may threw our way, in particular....so we did find an amusing angle in the GFP phase too..what if ASR donated his sperms long before he became the mighty RAIZADA ..hehehe..here are my views--

“ARNAV-THE VICKY DONOR .....ROFL....*laughing uncontrollably*

YAA SOME SPERM SEEKING AGENCY ASKED FOR DONATION AND ASR 'S COMPETITIVE ,EVER AMBITIOUS MIND SAID"WHAT THE...I WILL BE THE BIGGEST VICKY DONOR'...AND IF VICKY DONOR HAD 50-52 KIDS..I WILL ATLEAST HAVE 100....

SAU PUTRA MUBARAK,ARNAV BITWA....”

And then wrote my special remarks on BARUN’S trademark hair gel.. *yaa,I have written few on this too—uff I am indeed too much*...

“Hey lets go to RM and steal arnav's hair gel and khushi has plucked only one hair but let us give him a proper hair cut like past..ofcourse while he is sleeping..kya re barun –have u never seen hair gel before in ur life?????///urghhhhhhhhhhhh.... I guess Barun has been told by his agent that seeing his passionate love towards hair gel, all other telly & movie PHs have one condition only ”NO HAIR GEL,PLEASE”..thats why barun is fulfilling all his “GELLY” dreams in this assignment only..”

Moreover, barunomy returned on watching him eat English breakfast offered by khushi *most cosy love scene*..so i wrote..

“I  stole barun's hair gel...ISN'T HE LOOKING BARUNLICIOUSLY YUMMY at the breakfast table......hehehe”

And when it was all getting so disappointing that even DIV dropped the word ‘LOVE’ from the mention of her regular uploads..well here’s what I wrote to boost up the morales...

“OMG....reading all these sad comments is increasing my already depressed heart's BP...plz people don't lose heart, just remember what rakhi maiyaa said in the movie 'karan-arjun' "mere karan-arjun aayenge"....HAVE SOME FAITH DAMNIT....."HAMARE ARSHI BHI AAYENGE "

MUJHE BHAROSA HAI UN PAR UNKE PYAAR PAR...”

Hahaha..and then the much awaited and most beautiful ‘RABBA VE” happened and DIV correctly named it an “ALL IN ONE” scene...THE “AB NAA JAA” moment...u can easily guess that my happiness knew no bounds that day and I went into my super-hyper exhilarating modes and wrote not one but MANY...

BCOZ>>>>

“This highly awaited RABBA VE was like DO BOOND ZINDAGI KI...”

AS

Arnav in his best color:

BLUE

Khushi in her best color:

RED

Arnav looking:

HANDSOME-EST

Khushi looking:

GORGEOUS-EST

Both together looking:

BEST-EST

A PICTURE PAR EXCELLENCE

THE PERFECT COUPLE

THE PERFECT WAY TO REMEMBER THE PHENOMENON NAMED

"ARSHI"

Plus, do u all know that it happened on anniversary of LS-122 *yaa it did*..so as always I had few comparisons in mind....

WHAT A WAY TO CELEBRATE THE ANNIVERSARY OF

'THE ALMOST KISS'..

then it was hesitation, 

today it was acceptance

then it was realization, 

today it was recognition

then it was red sari, 

today it was red sari

then it was awesome,

today it was awesome

but alas

then it was ALMOST KISS

and today

it remained ALMOST KISS

But were we complaining for it remaining ‘ALMOST KISS’..nahhhhh as one of my fav arshians said in her usual saifuu mode that...

“It will always remain an almost kiss because the moment right before a kiss is the most awesome feeling ever... keeps u wanting more and more and just about there but not really there.... the waiting for it to happen n the excitement that its finally happening... the sweet silence before the explosion!”

Isn’t that the most lovely way to define “ALMOST KISSES”...saifu-ism rocks...

And hey ,lets not forget that it happened on our favourite place..THE POOLSIDE...and well....my freaky obsession with LS 197 returned *sheepish grin* so I wrote..

“CIRCLE OF 197 COMPLETED...he started it with giving her that iconic 'KISS WITH SOUND' on her cheek at the HOLY poolside and she completed it with giving the similar kiss at the same holy shrine.......WOW.....moods & contexts may be different but their LOVE---SAME TO SAME...”

Moreover, as I am trying to be all funny here, how can I forget the most comical character of the show..EVER SO COLOUFUL MAMIJI..we need to acknowledge mamiji and her legendary KARVACHAUTH MASK—THE KC MASK on this particular day...so here follows my tribute to her n her KC MASK..

~~ADVERTISEMENT FOR MANORAMA'S KC- MASK~~

A must have for all those BHUKKAD kHUSHIS' and those Cupid-struck NKs who believe in the ideology of KC but also believe more in their CFL(CRAZY FOOD LOVE).The mask not only protects u from all the festive smells of yummy food ,it also saves ur family from seeing those DYING FOR FOOD expressions which sumtimes r so dangerously funny (spally in case of khushis') that there is threat for family members to die from keeping the straight faces. So, buy one KC-MASK all attempting ladies and protect ur loved ones .

Didnt we all wondered how mamiji is going to break her fast and when it finally happened..well less said about tellywood logics is more better*sarcastic tone*...

I can forgive them for vanishing mamaji but will never ever forgive them for doing a GAYAB trick on MY LUXMIJI..As per gaurryy..I MISS THE GOAT MORE THAN ARSHI ..yaa I accept..*pouting hard*....well this next comment is dedicated to LUXMIJI...

ARSHI KE BEECH JO AAYEGA

SHYAM BABU HO JAYEGA

NAHIN THO LUXMIJI THO DEFINITELY HO JAYEGA

THEY SHUD SERIOUSLY BRING LUXMIJI BACK,,, after all diwali is around the corner and 'LUXMIJI' is badly needed...both literally and figuratively..*hehehe* “

Hey..Hey..If anyone one of u is even thinking that my sankipan ends with this , then U R SOO DAMN WRONG...I have written an advertisement for khushi’s dabba service too..here it is..

~~~~~KKGSR DABBA SERVICE~~~~~

The best catering service in town, here you will savour the BESTEST food made "DIL SE" with loads of jalebis' & sugar free halwa for all the diabetic people

FREE           FREE             FREE

copyrighted & registered @ KKGSR.INC

PATENT IN THE NAME OF KKGSR(yaa she got herself registered too..after all SHE IS THE ONLY ONE OF HER TYPES)

Address: M/s KKGSR DABBA SERVICE

C/O Shantivan,Bungalow no. '197',

Street no. '122',IPKKND Nagar ,ARSHI TOWN-'421'

ONLY ARSHIANS CAN ORDER...

421 IS THE PINCODE....PINCODE TO OUR G-WORLD*winks*

state: BARUNABAD 

country: ARSHILAND

Contact number is +91-282-364-420

* few of my fav LS-wink wink* 

HEHEHE..BOWING IN ACKNOWLEDGEMENT OF MY SANAKI TALENTS..

But u know whats the most truthful fact of our life...

“THE FACT OF LIFE:

OUR MOODS R DEPENDENT ON ARSHI'S MOODS

Khushi-- kissed him on the cheek and we gleamed with joy

Arnav-- broke her fast & we all were in awe

Arshi-- did their characteristic banter & we fall in love with them all over again

Arnav-- got the cutest slap & we all smiled like idiots

but the moment those big tears fall down her eyes,our heart was sliced ...Whatever be the result of this bull-shit crap..plz don't make her cry.....

I AM ARNAV IN THIS MATTER....CAN'T SEE HER CRY...*glum face*

Well at last CVs listened to our pleas..and GFP FIASCO was over---phewww ..

But then arnav took a panga with original sanka devi and her mission to find herself started..this is what I had to say about that...

“If khushi shud write a book about "romance bigade ke 100 tarike " then arnav shud write "KHUSHI KO PISS-OFF KARNE KE 100 TARIKE", he definitely knows the trick to put her in hers' SANKIEST moods....BUT THEN WHEN HE RUNS AFTER HER TRYING TO PATAO HER LIKE A 15-YR OLD TEENAGER AND DOES A "RABBA VE" BEFORE MAMIJI AND NANIJI WITHOUT CARING A DAMN.......AWWWWWW i forgive him for being author of that book.”

So she decided to became MRS. India...WELL WHAT CAN I SAY..khushi can do,think and make happen anything in the world....Can’t She???

The most beautiful thing about her latest panga was that it lead to the return of original ASR....if their story started with a ramp walk then who can forget her all famous ramp walk at the end of it all...hehehe...here it goes---

“I was just holding my breath when she was last one in the waiting area..then she fell and I gasped..then she started walking and I was more nervous than her..then anger started forming on his face and I was scared for her..AND THEN I LAUGHED LOUD..YAA I LITERALLY CLAPPED ..AS SHE JUST RAN...picked up her sandals and ran...HAHAHA..KHUSHI AT HER BEST...ASR AT HIS BEST...THE CIRCLE OF RAMP WALK COMPLETED”

But don’t u guys think that in all this funny mess, people who deserved appreciation are THE RAIZADA FAMILY...my dedication to them...

I AM PROUD OF RAIZADAS', they may speaks in their "WA" LANGUAGE, THEY MAY BE THE BEST PAYERS' TO ALL PUJARIS' OF NEW DELHI, they may wear the weirdest & loudest clothes*mamiji* & may restrict themselves to the traditional wears' but THEY R SO MODERN AT THEIR HEARTS

encouraging daughter in law of the house to participate in a modelling contest, accepting the single mother GFP with open arms, adopting the orphan kid & actually overwhelming him with their extra doses of love..NOW THATS WHAT ‘BEING MODERN’ MEANS..

Sahi Kaha Na????

Okkk...lets close this one*pheww it turned out to be quite a long one* with one last bizarre comment...

“Bcoz she is the IRON LADY..there is lots of iron in her veins...I THINK JALEBIS' SUMHOW HELPS IN CREATION OF IRON IN ONE'S VEINS..we shud stop her from eating those..THANK U TO MRS. INDIA CONTEST..ATLEAST FOR NEXT FEW DAYS SHE WILL REMAIN AWAY FROM JALEBIS' ,maybe THE IRON EFFECT will lessen AND WE WILL SEE THE GUTTRIEST EVER RABBA VE...*fingers crossed*”

This was my tribute to our never ending greed for guttery ‘Rabba VEs” ....

Ofcourse..once again u all r welcomed to share all ur thoughts about arshi, about the comical moments in the post marriage era and  entire show in general, ur views about the creative logics, about the hidden humour u discovered in all these logics and so on..and on..

No need to say that arshi journey continues...I need to make a choice for the next mood of our journey through this RV WORLD..and as its very difficult for me to decide which particular mood of ARSHI I like the most *as I like them all* ..I am going to create an opinion poll soon...do vote out...

And hey..I AM STARTING A NEW CHAPTER ON THE BLOG WITH MY NEXT POST...its titled

“ARSHIYAAN”

WELL THE THOUGHT BEHIND IT IS A SURPRISE..KEEP GUESSING TILL THE NEXT.....*naughty wink*

And of course our interactions through “MY RV WORLLD” will continue as usual....after all its BATOON BATOON MAIN RABBA VE.

P.S.. This post is dedicated to my dearest arshian dost..my sweetheart, my buddy ‘tabby’..

HAPPY BDAY DARLING..

ENJOYYY

As u love poetry..here's a small modulation I did to the song “tare zameen par”.. custom designed for u honey....

Dekho isse yeh hai arshi ki deewani..

Shabdon ke khel se yeh arshi ko jee le..

Jhagda kare phir khud hi mana le..*wink*

Bole bahut aur dil ko chura le...

Apne main anokhi hai yeh..

TARA ARSHILAND PAR...

Yeh tho hai arshipan main...

RABBA VE ke jaisi..

Uthere jo  blogistan ko sunhera sa karne..

Mann ki arshi-ism ko zindaa sa karne...

Simat gayi arshiyoon ko zindaa sa karne..

Apne main anoki hai yeh....

TARA ARSHILAND PAR...

Jaise aankhon ki deebiyaa main arshiyaan..

Aur arshiyoon main milte se ARSHI..

AUR SAPNON MAIN MIL JAAYE 

ARNAV SA KOI..

Jaise sukoon ke Jheeni si chaddar...

Jaise arshi ka meetha sa humdum..

JAISE BIN MATLAB KA 

PYAARA RISHTA HO KOI...

Yeh tho meri tabby-e-jaan hai...

Yeh tho meri arshi-e-humsafar hai...

Ek pyaari arshi-e-saugat hai...

APNE MAIN ANOKHI HAI YEH...

TARA ARSHILAND PAR....

I hope u will like it..and hey who said gifts r over....there is one more left darling....

A SLICE OF ARSHI

Based on the current theme, just a small attempt to give a sweet AAM WALA JUICY feeling to  our very own ARSHI n their legendary comic attempts...Yaa i can feel tht u r smiling tara..well thts what i want u to the entire day long..keep smiling and HAVE A BLAST.,...HAPPY WALA BUDDAY TO U...

*SEE NOW THATS THE HEIGHT OF LONG SPEECHES--EVEN MY P.S. SECTIONS CAN BE CONVERTED INTO POST ITSELF—HEHEHE*